I haven't been to church since I was let go. I am a strong and faithful believer in God and it is strange not to go to church and Worship on Sundays. But something in my heart is holding me back. It is too fresh; too painful for me to go to church right now. This is a bit strange for me, as my family belongs to a completely different church than the church where I worked. Still, I'm not ready. In fact, last Sunday afternoon I attended my father's choir concert at my childhood church. When they began to sing "Breath of Heaven" tears began rolling down my cheeks. I had done that song with my choir last Christmas, and the song was especially dear to me. I regained my composure afterward, and did enjoy the rest of the concert. That moment of sadness only made me more aware of the fact that I am not yet ready to go back to church. I hope that this feeling will pass with a little more time.
|Mary Jo, Kenna, and me.|
On Thursday, January 7, 2010, I celebrated my three month surgery anniversary. (I've since learned that these are referred to as "surgiversaries.") I am thrilled to be down 65 pounds, which is about 1/3 of my goal. But more important than that is the fact that I feel GREAT! It feels wonderful to see that in writing. I now know that having the surgery was the best gift I could have given myself. On January 14 I have my 3 month follow up at the hospital. I'm anxious to see how the doctor thinks I am doing. My hope is that he'll be pleased.
Some interesting changes have happened since the surgery.
- Things taste different. Some foods that I used to love, I now hate. Others taste so flavorful, it is amazing.
- I used to get hot and sweaty all of the time. It was embarrassing. Now, I am a freeze baby. I've even taken to using an electric blanket at night. (Thanks for the great Christmas gift, mom in law!)
- My PMS is horribly intense! Apparently, as women lose weight, the hormones stored in the cells are also released. This makes for some super crazy fluctuations!
- My back and neck pain has increased, and I've begun seeing my chiropractor on a weekly basis. I predict a future breast reduction. (Can't come soon enough!)
- I've rediscovered my hip (butt) bones. I just noticed this today, as I sat in Starbucks, chatting with Kenna and Mary Jo. I still have quite a bit to lose back there, but I'm off to a good start.
As time progresses, I am sure there will be many more changes for the better. I am so thankful that I had the opportunity to have this surgery.
Before I sign off, I want to ask all of you to keep my friend, Sharron De Costa, in your thoughts and prayers. We haven't seen each other in a long time, but were lucky to reconnect through Facebook. Sharron is a lovely person and is loved by many. This past week, she learned that she has uterine cancer. She is a strong, vibrant woman, and I know that she will kick this cancer in the butt. I cannot imagine how she must be feeling, so please send her good vibes. Love you, Sharron.
Until next time,
P.S. I'd like to post a picture of me, Mary Jo, and Kenna on this page. Does anyone know how to do that?